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Beginner restraint set

Less about the cuffs than about who is deciding.

Suits: Tried a little Usually costs: Least

Why this one

Being unable to move turns everything down except sensation, and being the one who decides turns something else up entirely. A beginner's set costs very little — and it is the only category here where the object matters less than the conversation you have before you use it.

What to look for

  1. Cuffs that release instantly under load: a clip or a hook-and-loop strap. Never a knot and never a lock, on a first set.
  2. Wide, padded straps. Anything thin puts all the pressure into one line and stops being enjoyable quickly.
  3. An under-mattress system rather than one that needs a particular bed frame.

Before you buy

Agree a word that stops everything before you begin, and check now and then that hands are warm and not tingling. Nobody restrained is left alone in the room, for any reason.

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